Travels in Cognition

There's a SIM Card in That Thar Crockpot!

2011-02-25T23:00:00.001-06:00

Or: What the Heck Do You Do All Day?

The other day I was thinking of grabbing a notebook and reporting everything that went on in my day. For no reason except for my own pondering. Somehow that turned into a goal to record it all in a blog post when I heard someone mention something about "lazy SAHMs". That's stay-at-home-moms. Though, personally, I much prefer Household Manager and Domestic Entrepreneur. And yes, that would be said tongue-in-cheek.

So I recorded nearly every moment of my day, but not the complete saga. I mean, I think I forgot to say that we ate breakfast, or that I tweezed my eyebrows, or searched for missing paperwork, etc. And I may or may not have popped back on the computer a few more times that what I've listed. Whatever. The following is extremely boring, but it could be worse. You could have had a play-by-play of me shaving my legs.

****************

6:30 a.m. : Wake up and see that the kids are already watching cartoons on Netflix while their dad makes himself breakfast. Great. Why do we not own a TV again?

6:45 a.m. : Go for run. Fall twice before I get smart and trade off between running on the street and the boulevards. Decide I REALLY don't like the Week 2.1 c25k download here. Too many drug and violence references for my delicate sensibilities. A little bit is okay. But this is over my personal limit. Disappointed because I really liked the Week 1.2 playlist. Possibly will have to find another one.

7:15 a.m. : Come home, shower, quick computer break. Emme comes out and tells me she has changed Juliet's (cloth) diaper all by herself. She is very proud. I am very proud.

7:20 a.m. : A few minutes later JJ crawls over to me, I pick her up, notice that her butt is decidedly UN-fluffy for a cloth-diapered girl. And that would be because her sister did change her diaper, yes. However. She forgot to put an actual diaper inside the new diaper cover. Thankfully, a disaster of epic proportions was averted by my quick prefold-stuffing skills. Skills. Yeah, I've got 'em. I'm cool like that.

7:45 a.m. : That was exhausting. So I take another quick computer break. An online forum is discussing Feminism (hello NFP friends!) and before I know it my research spark is lit and I spend a little too much time digging into the subject. Whoops. Mental note to curb computer time for the rest of the day.

9:00 a.m.: I make my bed, tidy the bathroom, get the kids ready and going on their chores, do my hair and in the process of all that, I notice that even my eyebrow hairs are turning white. Wonderful!

10:15 a.m.: Get the brilliant idea to precook a bunch of chicken breasts and ground turkey/beef and prechop a bunch of onions. Am having a difficult time staying on top of meals lately, so thinking that doing this and throwing the stuff in the freezer will be helpful to me at approximately 5 p.m. every day this week. Wonder why I never thought of that before? (Hm, could it be because I always get these 'brilliant ideas' but never follow through longer than a couple weeks?) So I start preparing all this food while lunch is cooking. Decide that I am hopeful that I can convince myself to do this more often. Decide to expect that I won't.

11:00 a.m. : Listen to Hannah unfurl to me her Great Book Club plan. I agree that this is a great plan, and yesterday we went to the library to pick up her book club kit for The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe. Which she has read. Multiple times. And has been read to her. Multiple times. Why she picked that one is anyone's guess, but who am I to question her self-directed educational prowess?

11:30 a.m. : We are all straightening up while dancing to some Kung Fu Fighting. The dancing turns into actual Kung Fu fighting by everyone except me, so I shut off the music for the time being.

11:35 a.m. : The library calls to tell me that we actually only have half the book club kit. Sweet librarian emails me the discussion questions instead of having to go back and get them. Which I wouldn't be able to do anyway because I had neglected to petition the use of our lone vehicle for the day.

11:55 a.m. : I realize that aforementioned book club is scheduled to meet at 2 p.m. today. Except that I haven't spoken to any of the parents. I decide to call and make sure they know that our daughters are planning to meet at our house today. They knew. It's all good.

12:00 p.m. : Try to read a math book to Max that he has been begging me to read to him all morning. I see that there is a page torn. He tells me it's "Ju-ju's" fault. I'm skeptical. Read the math book to him anyway. He is already correctly formulating mathematical sentences. I will try to focus on this good thing a little while later.

12:15 p.m. : Go down to do laundry. Come upstairs and see that Max is clearing off the table all by himself. Give him lots of love and praise. Pat myself on the back for training such a helpful little three-year-old. Will also try to focus on this good thing a little while later.

12:30 p.m. : Check on my chicken in the crockpot. See something blue floating in it. Ew! Dig out floating blue thing: an old (but still wanted) SIM card that had been lying on the table 20 minutes previous. Now here is where I try to focus on those better sides of Max. Except it doesn't work. I yell. A little.

12:55 p.m. : I've been listening to the same playlist over and over today. I put Juliet down for a nap while Train is playing. She kicks in time to Hey Soul Sister while nursing. Happy that I am finding her to be not only a fellow multitasker but also that she takes after me in the rhythm department (thank goodness!). But I decide that we have heard this playlist a few too many times today.

1:05 p.m. : Go down for another load of laundry. Find Emme reading her cat books. That kid has checked out every single book on cats/cat care/veterinarians/large cats/domestic cats/ASPCA guides/whathaveyou contained in our library. Entertain a fleeting worry that I have no idea what we will do next week when there are literally no more cat books for her to read. I guess she'll just start reading them all over again.

1:20 p.m. : Trip up the stairs carrying clean laundry. Realize that I have yet again neglected to vacuum the stairs. I am always forgetting to do that. Throw the laundry on my bed. Try to tell myself I will get it put away before bed tonight, all the while realizing that laundry in the proper places is merely a pipe dream.

1:30 p.m. : It is nearing time for the book club meeting and the kids are getting squirrely with excitement. I think that I need to create a calming playlist for times like these. I'll probably get to that eventually, but for the time being it is easier to let them watch a show while they wait. To make myself feel better, I say that it has to be an educational documentary.

1:40 p.m. : After ten minutes of listening to squabbling over Pets and Their Vets (Emme) vs. Secrets of King Tut (Hannah) vs. Go Diego Go! (we told him it was not an option, but he's persistent) I kick them all downstairs to their rooms. Not literally. Figuratively.

1:45 p.m. : Found some old hoagie buns in the freezer from back when we ate nonwhole-grain breads. Don't want to waste anything, so I chop it up into crouton sizes.

2:04 p.m. : It is book club time but no one is here yet. I look around and see that the kitchen sink and one counter are piled with dishes, which looks kinda scuzzy. But I also see that most things are picked up, the garbage is all out, and I have vacuumed and swept the floors, so I call it good and hope none of the guests notice. Or if they do, hope they don't care. Make the informed decision to hop on the computer for one more little break instead of doing the dishes.

2:15 p.m. : Only Michelle came, and she doesn't care if my dishes are done. Plus she knows that I'm not the dish-doer in the house, Conrad is. Have a nice little chat while the older kids discuss their book club plans and the younger ones find creative ways to bug them.

3:45 p.m. : Play Guess Who with Max.

4:00 p.m. : Play checkers with Hannah.

4:30 p.m. : Play Jenga with everyone. This is quickly abandoned, in a way, for a Jenga block-and-domino train. Man. We worked so hard to get that all set up (it fell, many many times), only to have it complete the entire show within seconds. Oh well. Obviously we just need more dominoes! The following video is sideways. I can't get it to straighten! Also, by this point in the day the floors are no longer swept nor vacuumed, but I swear I did it just three hours ago.

The video is not working. I'll have to try for it tomorrow :-(

5:30 p.m. : In the intense game-playing mode I was in for so long, I forget about supper. Quickly throw together a cranberry/balsamic salad.

5:45 p.m. : We eat dinner. Correction: Conrad and I eat dinner. The rest of them pick at everything and whine. Juliet happily eats her baby food but demands three jars of the stuff.

6:30 p.m. : I put JJ to bed and head off to run errands. Leave the husband, who is watching a tiger documentary with the older three, with strict instructions on when to put the rest of them to bed.

6:45 p.m. : ATM machine #1 is out of order.

6:55 p.m. : Drive to next ATM machine. #2 is in working order, thank you very much.

7:00 p.m. : Hy-Vee for staples we absolutely cannot live without for the next day.

7:25 p.m. : Back to the library for the second time in two days to get research materials for hubby. Drive all the way across town for this, only to (stupidly) remember that it is Friday and the library is closed.

7:45 p.m. : Drive all the way back across town to Target to return a black slipcover I absolutely adored and wanted with all my heart but realized very quickly, post-purchase, could not actually afford. Picked up a new memory card reader and printer ink in its stead.

8:30 p.m. : Come home and Conrad is asleep on the couch. The rest of them are watching Hello Kitty on Netflix. It is past all of their bedtimes. Grrr.

8:45 p.m. : Am uber-exhausted. Think about going to bed early, but get back on the computer. See, this is becoming a problem I think. I'm like a moth to a computer flame. I let the kids fall asleep on living room floor. Eh, it's Friday.

9:20 p.m. : I remember this blog post and make an executive decision that it must, absolutely MUST, be posted today. Because otherwise how would anyone know what I did today? My readers wait with baited breath.

10:00 p.m. : Realize that I forgot to put away groceries. Quickly do just that, and feel relieved that they weren't left out too long.

10:15 p.m. : But I find that the crockpotted chicken breasts (the ones cooked with the yummy SIM card) were left in the crockpot. Which had been turned off. Four hours previous. Recall which road is paved with good intentions... Then mutter to myself that I might as well just have let the SIM card cook with the rest of it.

10:57 p.m. : I. AM. GOING. TO. BED. Stieg Larsson is waiting for me, though I'll most likely fall asleep on him before finishing three pages.

Project 365: Day 46

2011-02-15T12:55:00.001-06:00

Juliet Escapade 3

Wow, I can't believe I made it all the way in here!

Hmmm, what's this thing...

Oh......hi, mom...

Oooooh, fuuuunnnn...!

Project 365: Day 45

2011-02-14T12:53:00.000-06:00

Juliet Escapade 2: Here I am just enjoying a lovely mid-day snack of alien lego men.

Project 365: Day 44

2011-02-13T12:37:00.011-06:00

Juliet Escapade 1: Here I am just hanging out under the computer desk. Everyone else seems to gather around it all day long, why not me?

Project 365: Day 43

2011-02-12T12:30:00.005-06:00

Her trademark "princess crown" birthmark

In the interest of full disclosure, I cheated. Obviously I cheated with the above picture, because it was just screaming, "Turn me into a monochromatic image, please!" But also I am using some pictures over the next few days taken from the same day, which was not today. I chronicled some of JJs escapades over the course of a mere 20 minutes and you'll be happy to note, at the end of this series, that she jam-packs quite a lot of mischief in 20.

Project 365: Day 47

2011-02-11T05:45:00.003-06:00

My Claddagh ring that I wanted for a really, really long time. Conrad surprised me with this one six years ago on my birthday (six years ago today!).

I have been following along with Me Ra Koh's SOAR recipients since halfway through last year. I try to do some of the exercises they do, but I've never posted one on my blog before today. I just thought this one was perfect to share, it being an anniversary of sorts, and I was trying to find an object as a self- portrait.

I liken this ring to a self-portrait not only because of the obvious symbolism (if you don't know the story behind the Claddagh, look here), but also because the photo looks like an object coming out of the shadows with a single source of light shining on it. That is the way I feel lately. I feel like I am just now leaving the shadows and starting to become the person I was always created by God to be. There are still shadows surrounding the ring. I'm not out into the light completely, and I probably never will be in this lifetime, but just as the ring seems to be doing, I am starting to move closer and closer into that single source of light.

I am a little sad because I cannot wear this ring anymore unless I get it sized down. That's not very likely to happen. The irony is that the reason I am sad and cannot wear it any longer is because I am finally losing this weight, which is part of my feeling of emerging from the shadows. Emergence stings, but it makes you shine brighter. Full circle, baby.

Project 365: Day 41

2011-02-10T12:12:00.011-06:00

Every once in a while they stop fighting long enough

to look as if they like each other for the camera.

Project 365: Day 40

2011-02-09T08:06:00.000-06:00

Real Life

Every once in a while I get a shot of Real Life. It may not be the prettiest picture, it may seem odd to other people, but it is reality as we know it in this season of life. The reality is: the vacuum cleaner is always out, Max must wear layers of his older sisters' socks to go out and play when his little sister is sleeping in the bedroom they share, and my husband's hands are looking older because he is losing a lot of weight and works very hard every day to provide for us.

Project 365: Day 39

2011-02-08T08:01:00.000-06:00

Juliet's bear she received from the Hy-Vee employees when she was born. Her sisters insist she named the bear, "Eh".

I really love this picture. I think the detail is really crisp, plus the colors are so warm it just makes me want to squeeze the cuddly bear.

Project 365: Day 38

2011-02-07T07:40:00.000-06:00

My only look-a-like.

Why is it that kids have no qualms about getting all bundled up to play in the freezing cold? Personally, I am not fond of getting all the junk out and layering everyone all up. Thankfully the groundhog didn't see his shadow!

Project 365: Day 37

2011-02-06T07:29:00.000-06:00

His usual pose.

This face looks somewhat familiar...the eyes, the cheeks, the chin...

Project 365: Day 36

2011-02-05T07:27:00.003-06:00

Sleeping? Or reading?

Project 365: Day 35

2011-02-04T07:20:00.001-06:00

Redneck Life...the perfect Midwestern party game!

Project 365: Day 34

2011-02-03T07:18:00.000-06:00

It's rare to get a shot of this guy looking natural...

And what is funny is that as I put this picture up, JJ on my lap points and says, "DA-DEE!"

Project 365: Day 31

2011-01-31T14:25:00.001-06:00

Santa Claus gave this to me in my stocking. The only planner I've used for more than three weeks without looking for something "better". It's like organizing heaven every time I open it. I am not one for electronic organizing; it's just not the same as the satisfaction of having something rattling around in your brain and physically writing it down.

Project 365: Day 30

2011-01-30T14:20:00.000-06:00

My sweetener of choice. Lower on the glycemic index than sugar or honey.

Project 365: Day 29

2011-01-29T14:14:00.001-06:00

My new phone

Sorry for the dark picture. In a quest to lower any bills that we can, we decided to go with a new cell phone plan that will end up saving us around $35 per month. And it just so happens that I ended up with the coolest phone I've ever had :-)

Project 365: Day 28

2011-01-28T11:14:00.000-06:00

What I am reading, part 3, and this is the end of the boring book posts :-)

This one is my absolute favorite! Now, understand that if anyone ends up reading this based on my recommendation, that I do not necessarily agree with every little idea Mr. DeMille espouses. Mostly this would be his political and sometimes religious statements. However, just because some of these statements happen to be contrary to my own beliefs, it does not negate the fact that this is the. most. excellent. book on education I have ever read. It all just makes so much sense to me.

Technically we have been following a TJEd (or Leadership Education) method for a while now, just from what I have read about it online and talked about it with other homeschoolers. But I had never actually read the book before (whoops), and this has now affirmed for me that we are going in the right direction. Especially love the appendices with realistic approaches and book lists.

Project 365: Day 27

2011-01-27T11:03:00.002-06:00

What I'm reading right now, part 2

I know, I know, James Patterson??? But quite honestly, I love to read book series, and the Alex Cross series is a little addicting. I must confess that I have also read Patterson's numbered series about the Women's Murder Club, as well. There. Phew. Full disclosure. Anyhoo....I am down to the last four books of the Alex Cross series, which I will most likely finish by next week, and then comes the letdown. Does anyone know what I mean? That huge empty feeling when you finish a series and then you have to go find something else to read? It's so easy to just pop over to the library and grab the next few books in a series, no thought involved, no time wasted. But when I'm between books I feel so lost.

Project 365: Day 26

2011-01-26T11:02:00.001-06:00

What I'm reading right now, part 1

I've actually been reading this book for a few weeks now. It takes me longer to finish nonfiction because I mostly limit myself to reading educational books during our study times. Fiction books I can devour at an average rate of 2-3 per week.

So, even though it's taking me forever to finish this book, I really like it! I have never been one for history much; I think because in school it was just so gosh darn boring with memorizing dates and other facts. My entire 16-year mantra was "memorize just enough to get an A on the test and then promptly forget it all". But I really like when history is put into a single perspective like this. How Lincoln Learned to Read is an overview of twelve famous Americans in the context of their educations, which really makes history come alive (to use a terrible cliche).

It's also interesting because I am really on a kick to learn as much as I can about education. Most of these twelve people had very different educations from what we are used to as a collective country today. There were good points and less favorable points to each, but the fascinating part is how they all came out as what most people would consider "successes".

Project 365: Day 20

2011-01-20T13:54:00.001-06:00

"Laynie" and "Maya" having a nature picnic in the living room. Was playing around with focal distances, probably would be cuter cropped a bit, but I am committed to the SOOC learning experience...

Project 365: Day 19

2011-01-19T13:47:00.001-06:00

Conrad got me these tiny roses a few months ago when I was feeling down. Hannah and I hung them upside down to dry.

He's always doing this--getting me flowers, getting me "stuff", when I am having a bad time. It took me a while to appreciate the sentiment, because I'm not really a "flower" person, and gifts aren't necessarily my love language. But over time I've come to accept that I need to value the efforts of others, and I do have a husband who makes every effort. Sometimes it's a steep learning curve for him (ha! and for me too!) but the longer we are together, the very much more I appreciate everything he does do from his heart.

Project 365: Day 18

2011-01-18T13:42:00.005-06:00

The wall art above my piano. Everyone always comments on it. I didn't even realize that I wasn't composing very well; mainly it was desperation to get a photo on here so I don't skip another day! It will be nice when the warm weather returns so I don't have to scrounge around the same couple rooms of the house to find something to shoot.

Project 365: Day 17

2011-01-17T13:41:00.000-06:00

"Mom, I'm SuperHuman Max! So I can save Juliet and she don't fall down the stairs again."

Yes, the baby fell down the stairs because someone failed to close the door behind them. Thank goodness she was okay, because she needed her strength in order to try to crawl out of her crib and fall out of it as well last night. Needless to say, there is now an auto-shut baby gate being installed at the top of the stairs and the crib mattress is moved down to the lowest point, but I am also contemplating a crib tent.

But this little guy, he's also a big stinker. We've reached the point where I'm fairly sure I won't have to call 911 again to retrieve him, but he's learned all about the "sassy three" stage recently. My only consolation is that I've had four years since the last "sassy three" stage, but she was quite mild in sassiness compared to the other two. My sassy nine-year-old and this sassy three-year-old both have slammed doors in anger this morning. (Not allowed, consequences were given, lest you think they would be allowed to get away with this.) Sigh. At this rate my white streaks will rival Paula Deen's by next year.

At least he wants to be a SuperHuman to protect his sister. That's a virtue, right? It is very hard to get a good picture of him because he refuses to stand still. This picture is proof to me that I need to learn how to use AI Servo, but it's just so confusing . Mainly, I just need to take the time to do it, I guess. Learning is the whole point of this, right?

Project 365: Day 15

2011-01-15T18:04:00.002-06:00

Chubby Bubby

Project 365: Day 14

2011-01-14T19:20:00.000-06:00

Three-for-one: Emme's new haircut.

Picture #1 I was sitting further away from her, and she was sidelit from the window. Would have worked better if I had turned 45 degrees and put her in front of me.

Picture #2 Her face is better lit overall, but I should have used a slower shutter speed to lighten it up (was already at a 1.8 aperature).

Picture #3 Could also use a higher exposure, but overall I think the best lit, face-wise.

I really like her new cut. She hasn't had bangs since she was two years old, and with the amount of hair she had then, you could hardly call it bangs. She's the kind of girl that doesn't brush her hair or care if it is hanging all stringy in her face, so she should wear this style well!

Project 365: Day 13

2011-01-13T19:38:00.000-06:00

Bye-Bye Christmas. Bye-Bye Nativity. Hello Ooooordinary Time. So...ordinary..

We finally took down the tree and all the decorations. I had to get one last image of the Advent/Christmas/Nativity/Whatever Tree because it was like a symbol this year. Lots of growing pains, but we finally are on track to establishing our own family traditions.

Now, I admire a gorgeously decorated genuine pine or fir tree as much as the next person, and if you are a person who can pull that off, well more power to ya! I, however, am most comfortable with a well-used fake tree covered in a hodge-podge of yearly keepsake ornaments from my childhood, "handcrafted" ornaments by small children, and random bits and pieces of tinsel and clothing tags sprinkled at will for best effect. Topped off by an nonworking light-up angel bought for 99 cents at Goodwill. And one must not forget the Christmas Nail hidden far beneath the branches.

Going Public

2011-01-13T15:37:00.000-06:00

I must confess, I have another blog on my list, officially public as of today.

http://yesphotography.blogspot.com/

Currently offering an excellent "grand opening" special, but I'm all about affordability, so remember: I'm willing to barter services too!

Project 365: Day 12

2011-01-12T21:26:00.000-06:00

Hannah posing with her very first ever American Girl Doll, which she has named Maya.

Project 365: Day 11

2011-01-11T21:32:00.001-06:00

"Even my very helpful sister is NOT ACCEPTABLE to me!"

This is by far not a great picture. However, it does say something about where we are in life at present. Verily I say unto you: if one were to want to know what life has been like for me lately, all one would have to do is look at this picture. Because that's how she looks 95% of the time in this, her eleventh month. It surely doesn't take much imagination to picture, then, how I have looked 95% of the time in the last month...

Project 365: Day 10

2011-01-10T21:23:00.001-06:00

I like to call this "Jar of Water Placed Near the Window on a Winter's Day" ;-)

This says Winter to me. So...blah... The lovely 42"+ of pristine white snow* we had in the month of December has now turned a yucky gray and black and...blah... Christmas is over, the weather is getting colder...blah... The most blah of all is the inside of my van in Winter. Actually it's more ew than blah. But at least the days are getting longer!

*wait, is pristine white snow something like triply redundant???

Project 365: Day 9

2011-01-09T19:31:00.000-06:00

Juliet and her grandmother sharing a moment.

Well, I'm a few days behind because of being on vacation. Some parts of it were really good and quite fun, and if you are reading this and we visited you on our vacation, we had a great time with you :-) Some parts of the trip, unfortunately, were not so good. Even heartbreaking at times, but, what are you gonna do, you know? We mourn the loss of some relationships, and yet out of loss, our marriage and family become stronger. There is always, always a silver lining.

Project 365: Day 4

2011-01-04T08:48:00.004-06:00

Braided Agave and Honey Oat Bread. I am dying to adjust the white balance on this photo, but the bread still looks yummy...I think I want more...

Project 365: Day 3

2011-01-03T08:38:00.003-06:00

Sir Ralph C. A. T., III, Esquire, basks in the glow of our Christmas tree lights. I'll probably come back and look at this one lots because it is so cozy-looking. He got an LED pointer and a hand-puppet brush-type thing in his stocking, and is now feeling like the royalty he always knew he was.

Project 365: Day 2

2011-01-02T12:31:00.016-06:00

Photo of my "baby" brother, with my nephew's mom holding Juliet in the background. I like this one because it really says 50 mm f1.8 to me!

New Year: Project 365: Day 1

2011-01-01T20:28:00.000-06:00

My Project 365 goal this year is to practice getting correct exposure and color in-camera. Fair warning, all photos will be SOOC and not edited at all...I have a feeling it won't all be pretty. But I hope to get better at this, gaining time in post process and saving the editing for capturing certain photo styles desired by individual clients.

Day 1: A Christmas ornament my parents have had since before I was even around. Or somewhere around there. There is something incredibly comforting about your parents' Christmas tree, right?

This has been one of the best Christmases ever. We are taking our time celebrating and will even be celebrating past Epiphany (January 6) this year. I have a feeling Monday, January 10 is going to hit like a ton of bricks, but I'm trying to enjoy it until then.

Along the same lines, I recently postulated to my husband a really super-simple solution to what seems to be a growing dilemma about "Christmas" and who seems to own the word/holiday/season. Some Christians resent the commercializing and secularizing of our second most important holiday of the year. And then the commercializ-ers and seculariz-ers resent mention of the word "Jesus" when trying to celebrate their holiday dedicated to Peace, Love, and Joy. For the sake of brevity, I'm leaving out those who celebrate other holidays which just so happen to also coincide with the winter solstice; "Happy Chanukah", "Happy Kwanzaa", "Merry (or whatever) Saturnalia" don't really have any other connotations, unlike the seemingly innocent "Merry Christmas".

So here's my solution: Everyone who wants to "keep Christ in Christmas" just needs to give the word away. There's no getting it back, and frankly, the trees, the santas, the lights, the gifts, the reindeer, the hustle and bustle and energy...are really fun and will always be associated with "Christmas". And now instead, when wishing to refer to the holiday based on Luke 2:1-20 we need merely to wish each other a "Blessed Nativity". There ya go--two holidays in one and think how much less confusing for the children ;-)

Short blurb for posterity

2010-05-14T11:44:00.002-05:00

Hannah wanted to go play outside, but she wanted to go further than I usually let her. Here's the convo that ensued:

Me: You must stay around our yard, nowhere else, got it?

H: in exasperation MOM. I have my bike and I've got my ninja skills. I'll be FINE.

Situational Irony

2010-05-11T15:39:00.002-05:00

You should have seen the look on his face. I somehow knew it was her just from that look. He had an excruciatingly difficult time being civil, and after nearly four years he remembered every detail of her face and stooped-over walk. In the end, he did hold his tongue until she was out the driveway. How could we have predicted that she would show up at our door after all this time wanting a Freecycle item from our home?

Now we would get to experience more little verbal nuggets from our special church friend. Hooray! Highlights from this afternoon's occurrence:

"Now how do I know you? Why do you look familiar to me..."

Conrad: "Church."

"Mmm, oh yes, that's it."

"Well don't just stand there like an idiot, move!"

"What a little pretty baby! You're still holding her?"

Me: Explains the enigma that is Miss Juliet--she just cries all day long when set down.

"Well, that's a BAD BABY! You are SPOILING her! Tsk, tsk."

***********************************************

On a different note, I am laughing at my former parent-of-two-children self from 2006. I use the cry room all the ding-dang time. And everyone else at church has learned to come to expect all sorts of distractions from our family by now. If she thought that was bad, she should see us these days.

Feet!

2010-05-03T14:50:00.001-05:00

Juliet and Her Grandpa

2010-04-23T02:41:00.000-05:00

Trying Something New

2010-04-21T13:53:00.003-05:00

Me? Trying something new? I know, unbelievable, right? I'm just dripping with sarcasm here, in case you are reading this and don't really know me. It's so big, so revolutionary, I just had to share. Ready? Here it is...

I'm planning ahead!

Woo-hoo! That's big, ain't it?

Planning ahead meal-wise, that is. Not just planning out meals for the week--that's nothing new--but actually cooking them ahead as well. See, we have this problem of eating out WAY too much in our family. Unhealthy, of course, but even bigger of a problem is that it is very quickly d-r-a-i-n-i-n-g away our (well, hubby's) hard-earned money. The number of times eating out last week=7. It may be normal for some people, but for us that is just actually unacceptable.

The draw for me is the convenience, pure and simple. You eat somewhere else, that means someone else has to take the time to cook and the time to clean up. You arrive, eat, and leave, and you don't even make a dent in your clean kitchen. It's very attractive, I must say. However, there's the $$$ thing, as I mentioned earlier. Eating out is not so convenient when it comes to balancing the checkbook...

So anyway, after I came to this realization that things needed to change, I figured there was only one of two things I could do: either buy more convenience-type foods at the grocery store or do something like OAMC. The latter was out right away; I don't like a lot of re-cooked food that's sat in a freezer for a month, and we don't have a lot of room with our 1.5 freezers after harvesting from the garden. As for the grocery convenience food, at times it is more expensive than Burger King and more often than not, just as bad for you--or worse.

But then as I was making my meal list for the week, I had a thought. What if I just took one morning a week and pre-prepared (is that a word? it is now...) what I could for the next week's menu? Then everything wouldn't have to come out of the freezer, it would still be mostly-from-scratch meals, and it would be convenient at the same time. Does everyone already do this? Is this one of those things that everyone else just knows but it takes a kick in the head for me to figure out? Don't answer that.

So here's what the oldest three and I did this morning:

-precooked two meals' worth of chicken

-browned ground beef for spaghetti

-prepared the spaghetti sauce

-made 16 waffles

-made one loaf of blueberry bread

-crockpotted (another new word for the day) two meals' worth of pork

-made 15 individual scrambled egg circles for breakfast sandwiches

-cut up an impressive amount of lettuce

So! I'm excited to see how this experiment works this week. And just to set the record straight, yes, I love writing about the mundane happenings of everyday life. Isn't everyone as excited about new tactics for the running of a household as I am? Don't answer that.

Asian Sprout Salad

2010-04-11T07:46:00.002-05:00

A while back I promised to post some recipes. Well, I kept thinking that it needed to wait until I could remember to photograph the end products, but you know what I've discovered? This is impossible. I have four kids home all day long, every day. By the time I get around to making supper/dinner/whateveryoucallit, there is no time or organization to take pictures.

Plus, there's really bad lighting in my house after 1 p.m. (this is the bane of my existence, quite honestly).

I just want to share some yummy things, most of which are really easy. This one's the absolute easiest of all.

Asian Sprout Salad

Lettuce (my preference for this salad is a butter and red leaf mix)

Chicken breast(s), cut up

Garlic

Ginger

Red pepper

Soy sauce

Hoisin or teriyaki sauce

Sprouts (I like broccoli sprouts best)

Grated carrots

Chow mein noodles

Marinate the chicken in the garlic, ginger, pepper, and sauces, then stir-fry. Or just stir-fry it all together. Mix the lettuce, sprouts, carrots, and noodles together. Top with the chicken. Sometimes I go ahead and toss the whole thing with some light asian dressing, but the husband does not prefer this.

Notice may be taken that I have no ingredient amounts listed. That's because I never use the same amount twice; I just throw in what looks right or what I have. Personal preference will dictate the amounts you use.

See? Easy. Not to mention super-cheap. I think next I'll share our other favorite salad, taco salad!

Faces of Max

2010-04-09T07:24:00.012-05:00

Mr. Max is just three months shy of turning three. I'm not really sure where those three years went, but man, is his personality just bursting out of the little dude now! I'm always being demanded to "take pitcher Macky, Mom!" and this face is what usually results:

He absolutely adores spending time with other boys, as he gets enough girliness in each day to last a lifetime.

Here we are, trying something new.

The little stinker likes to run away when I call him. Such was the case right before this photo, and he stops for a split second for me to snap it.

Aaand, this is how we know Max is tired. The classic rub-the-hand-on-the-ear pose.

I Need to Learn to Enunciate

2010-04-01T07:06:00.003-05:00

Disclaimer: My apologies, but this post runs on the risque side. Don't say I didn't warn you...

The Scene: A regular old Burger King. I am once again very brave for taking all four kids out to run errands for the day and have rewarded us with a lunch at BK. Say what you will about the healthiness or lack thereof, it is a reward to me! The following is the dialogue which took place between me and a daughter. Bet you can't guess which one.

Me: Takes a swig of my Dr. Pepper.

Daughter: Mom, can I have a drink of your Doctor's Pecker?

Me: Chokes on my Doctor's Pecker, spitting it out onto the table, causing the rest of the restaurant to stare in a concerned fashion.

And the rest of the conversation just isn't as exciting, so I'll stop right there.

I'm sorry, but you can't say I didn't warn you.

More Faces of Juliet

2010-03-30T01:26:00.003-05:00

Faces of Juliet

2010-03-29T01:17:00.000-05:00

She is a very expressive baby, just like her sister Emme.

Here she is, one month old already!

PSA: Very Important Message Regarding Education

2010-03-27T12:48:00.005-05:00

I think the reason I find parenting so challenging is that I am constantly learning from it. In my previous life I was pretty opposed to learning things. It didn't even ever cross my mind that the purpose of school was to educate yourself until my last semester of college when I really had to try hard to get that 'A'; no Learning-By-BS-Method allowed. But by then it was too late on the school front and I was just months away from being a parent anyway, so it's been on the parenting field that I have had the majority of my edumacatin'.

Which brings me to what I have learned today. In parenting multiple children who tend toward the sibling rivalry side, nothing shuts off the bickering faster or regains their BFF status with one another better than this: Give them a common enemy. And I must say that I am more than willing to be that enemy if it will get the noise to STOP. What can I say, the sacrifice is worth it.

This public service announcement has been brought to you by One Tired Mama, who just today found that making fighting sisters sit and face the wall for the rest of the day will make them briefly despise her but really works to stop the fighting.

College Life

2010-01-06T09:43:00.003-06:00

So, we have a friend who's going back to college in a week or so. This information is what sparked the following conversation, and as such, I dedicate this entire post to Michelle (although something tells me you may not find as many crazy antics at this age...)

Daughter: What was it like to be in college?

Me: Let's see. Well, when your dad and I were in college, we used to run around late and night with a group of friends and play on all the neighborhood playgrounds. Then I would stay up and walk around downtown smoking a cigar with April at 3 a.m. And sometimes we would decide to take off in the middle of the night and do a joyride up to Canada. Or pile a bunch of people in the back of a pickup truck in winter and ride off into the country and then lay on a dirt road and watch the sky. Other nights 30 or 40 people would gather in one little dorm room and read the Bible and pray.

But not everything took place at night, oh no. Mommy and a group of girls decided one day to go steal Daddy's underwear and write his name and phone number on it in black permanent marker and then hang it on a light pole outside his dorm. That was fun. Until Daddy chased Mommy down and wrote all over her face with that same marker... Daddy also used to like to push Mommy into snowbanks and underwater. Some day I'll forgive him for all of that.

Daddy and Jarid liked to make up songs and sing them for the whole school while taking off their shirts. And they liked to put up posters of themselves all over campus telling people to vote for them too. Some crazy people called Dancin' Freaks would run around everywhere blasting music and dancing outside.

And there was Tubthumping

And Barbie Girl

And All Stars!

Some people liked to drink beer and party and do all kinds of crazy things in college. We were crazy enough without all that anyway. Then Mommy and Daddy got married and you were born just a few weeks after Mommy graduated. That was college. The end.

Daughter: Ummmmmm, okaaaaayyyyyy? But didn't you do any school in college?

Me: Whoops.

2009 Recap: December

2009-12-31T08:55:00.003-06:00

No pictures taken in November. None! I'm not sure that has happened in years. Oh well. To round out and round up my recap of the year, here's a little picture story. My creativity got thrown out the window recently so I forgot how the story was going to go. Anyone want to make up words to the story? If you come up with something really funny I'll send you something.

Happy New Year's Eve, Merry Blue Moon, Good Riddance 2009, and Welcome 2010!

2009 Recap: October

2009-12-29T18:23:00.005-06:00

Building a leaf fort in the back yard. I'm sensing a 2009 "fort" theme... We even have had multiple forts inside the house this year.

Hannah singing in the church choir.

2009 Recap: September

2009-12-29T17:47:00.000-06:00

On Emme's birthday we hung out in LaCrosse, WI, for really no reason other than there's a Chuck E Cheese. On the way home we stopped at the Shrine to Our Lady of Guadalupe. It's just beautiful up there, but we arrived 15 minutes before it closed and it was pouring rain :-( Every time we go there, something messes up and we can't ever see the whole thing.

I had never seen this statue of Mary with lost unborn children, though, and through the rain it was quite poignant.

2009 Recap: August

2009-12-29T08:45:00.003-06:00

My nephew on the slip 'n slide. Doesn't this just scream summer? August was a beautiful month! Of course I was sick for most of it and it passed in a blur (pregnant again, you know), but the weather was nice anyway.

This is Max in the tub, which is where I scooped him up and landed him after I found him behind a chair eating marshmallow cream out of the jar with his fists. I really don't even know why I had marshmallow cream in the house, since that's more of a Christmasy-baking-type purchase around here. I'm also going to maintain that I have no idea how an open jar of marshmallow cream could have landed right next to my favorite chair in the living room when I just happened to have gotten up for a minute to "use the facilities". I think I'll blame this on the kids as long as I live...

2009 Recap: July

2009-12-28T17:18:00.000-06:00

Our group got together in July to watch the town festival parade at one of the member's houses. This is Killer. She does have a real name. It's an old lady name and I know what it is even though nobody is supposed to. She prefers to be referred to as Killer.

This is Father John from our CL group. He is from Sudan and has an interesting yet heartbreaking story of his past.

Emme and her BFF waiting anxiously for the parade to begin.

2009 Recap: June

2009-12-28T12:54:00.006-06:00

All three kids worked diligently on a massive card for their dad's birthday. It was made on the back of a Hy-Vee paper bag just for him. Notice the sprawl of art supplies on the school room floor; when they get into a project they really get into a project.

This fort was made entirely of leftover metal tomato stakes, an ugly sheet, and duct tape and lasted pretty much the whole rest of the summer. I will say one thing about these kids, I do admire their creativity and ingenuity! I'm also thinking that on this 10-degree wind chill day in December, I am coveting the very green-ness of our yard...

Speaking of creativity and inginuity...ahem...Max thought he'd turn sand into food. Yummy.

2009 Recap: May

2009-12-24T11:15:00.000-06:00

In May we traveled to the west side of the state for my aunt and uncle's 40th anniversary celebration. However, we spent a good deal of the day taking all the kids to the park to get them out of the adults' hair. I was mostly entertained by my husband and my brother making fools of themselves on all the playground equipment.

This picture looks more scandalous than the real situation, which was Max made a new friend named Anika when our good college friends came to visit, and they gave each other a quick kiss. Next time, though, I'll need to specify on the cheek. :-)

2009 Recap: April

2009-12-23T10:39:00.000-06:00

We actually had a pretty warm April up here, and the fun was all about getting outside. I swear, I think we went to one zoo or another about every week at first. These first two pictures are both taken at separate zoo trips.

This monstrosity is Conrad's first attempt at a cold frame for the garden plants. It actually works quite well and is made from scrap wood and an old crank window. Our kids and neighbor kids nearly killed the contraption a few times over the summer, but it still lives and is ready to be used again in a few short months. Hopefully short months, anyway.

We have a large marshy wasteland-type area behind our house, and since when we moved in to our house in October 2008 it was nearly winter, the girls couldn't wait to get out and explore it this spring.

2009 Recap: March

2009-12-22T10:22:00.004-06:00

Flowers from a dear friend after my D&C. Aaaand, that's about it for March. Photos from April more than made up for the lack of ones in March.

2009 Recap: February

2009-12-20T16:44:00.006-06:00

This past February started out with me being pregnant. Max was very excited to wear this shirt, although he wasn't entirely sure what all the fuss was about. This one is a little bit hard to look back on, knowing now what the outcome was going to be. The one thing that makes me smile about it, though, is that the shirt still slightly fits him nearly a year later.

Cousins are always fun!

We went to South Dakota for a quick weekend and my mother-in-law had a birthday supper for her and I. Notice Max chowing on the ice cream cake.

2009 Recap: January

2009-12-17T11:29:00.003-06:00

2009 has been a year that I wouldn't necessarily ever want to repeat. Like all years, it had its peaks and valleys, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't ready for it to end. And so, in the spirit of reminiscing and bringing 2009 to a close in order to open wide the doors of 2010, I'll be sharing some of our not-yet-shared-on-this-blog-or-on-Facebook highlights (maybe a couple lowlights, kept to a minimum, of course) in photo form.

Pretty sure January was a relatively boring month. We did have company early on, which was fun but I don't have any pictures from that particular visit. I think we were so worn out from hosting three different Christmas get-togethers at our home, scrambling to finish putting in our new kitchen floor, scraping wallpaper, and painting to really do much of anything.

However, we did manage to get to see the traveling Vatican exhibit at the Minnesota History Center right before it left. Also, just as an aside for a moment, someone really needs to take down that billboard on I90 advertising this exhibit coming to The Cities. It's starting to grate on my nerves. I mean, what if someone saw that billboard, was interested in seeing the exhibit (because really, no one can pass up a traveling Vatican exhibit, right?), and decided to take a detour north, only to find out they were about one year too late?

So....where was I....oh yeah, so the exhibit was great and the kids really enjoyed it, but it would have been more productive for the grownups to have gone on their own. Sheepishly I am admitting that I have no recollection of what this exhibit in the photo was about. It's just the only picture that turned out and was outside the main exhibit hall where no cameras were allowed.

Boring Bulleted Updates

2009-12-14T05:55:00.002-06:00

Happily whittling away the time in my third trimester. Ever since I stopped feeling deathly ill about 10 weeks ago, it's gone by really fast, thank goodness! (But still, February really can't come fast enough.)
Week 3 of Advent is coming up this week. Last year's "Advent Tree" and decorating according to the liturgical calendar worked out so well that we've decided to make it a family tradition. I have to tell you, it also takes a lot of stress out of trying to get all the Christmas decorating done in one day.
Babysitting, babysitting, babysitting. I actually don't mind watching other people's kids, which is good because I've been doing it a lot lately. But I also depend a lot on other people to help me with my own brood, and thankfully I have a wonderful support system for this. So naturally it makes me happy to be part of a support system for others!
Taking lots of pictures with my now-outgrown-to-me camera and just waiting on Christmas so I can hopefully finally get an actual lens for my new camera. It's hard to take pictures on a camera with no lens. Any rich people reading this who would like to send me an anonymous Christmas gift feel free to take a look at my #1 choice here.
My kids have decided to switch bedrooms. Apparently a 6 y.o. girl and 2 y.o. boy rooming together and an 8 y.o. girl and a yet-to-be-born (and even then probably not occupying for at least another four months) baby girl rooming together work better than the older girls together and the younger two together. Can you guess who gets the sweetest deal here? Oh well, their choice!
I've been cooking experimentally a lot lately. And feeling the urge to share some made-up recipes in which I won't ever measure anything and may or may not remember all the ingredients. That's helpful, right? Look for some of these delicious yet utterly nonhelpful recipes in the coming weeks.

The Evil Overpopulator Strikes Again

2009-12-11T08:07:00.003-06:00

I know it's been a long, long while since I've been visited by the blogging muse, but I'm going to go ahead and jump in today because I saw this and I want to applaud the sentiment. I don't really need to say a lot more because she says exactly what I think. I have heard that it is selfish to have more than three children, more than two children, more than one child, any children. For one thing, that makes me laugh--environmental impact aside--really? Selfish?! Somehow I doubt the people saying these things to me have ever tried to run a family and household full of children. Not trying to play the martyr here, but selfish is not the word that comes to mind.

In our family we try our best to be good stewards of the resources we are blessed with. In the interest of full disclosure, I fully admit that our carbon footprints aren't usually the number one aspect I take into consideration when making day-to-day decisions...usually it's the financial aspect. A blessing in disguise is that when you don't have a lot of financial resources, the environmental and financial aspects of decision making tend to intersect. I'm nearly positive that our one-vehicle, small house, strictly second-hand-shopping, gardening, ridiculously frugal "large" family of nearly six probably has a much smaller carbon footprint than your average American upper-middle-class family of four (population replacement level).

The best thing about being an environment-preserving parent of a "large" family, though, is that I can teach these things to my children. The way we live is something I try to pass on to them in order to have four future families being good stewards of the Earth.

Do I sound defensive? Maybe I am a bit, but I don't mean to be. It's not that I honestly don't care what other people do, because I do hope that others make good environmental decisions. But I say live and let live. While you'd never hear me chastising another for making a different choice, there are many who chastise overpopulation as the biggest drain on the world's resources, and that is what I'm trying to defend against.

The Awful Realization

2009-10-21T06:54:00.002-05:00

The attitude I may or may not have consistently shown to my husband regarding his geekery in all things...well, geek-ish (think comic books, RPGs, action figures, fascination with archaic languages not to mention archaic British science fiction television shows)...may or may not have thus far bordered on pure scorn.

That has now changed, in light of my awful realization this morning. Here's how it went down:

Me, driving: laughs

Him: What?

M: Oh, I was thinking about how I am so looking forward to seeing two Juliets this winter!

H: Two? Who's the second?

M: Your unborn daughter, duh!

H: Uh, then who's the first?

M: You know? The one that comes 39 days before our Juliet? What I've been waiting for since May 22, 2009????

H: Uggggggggggggggg. Groan. You've GOT to be kidding me.

M: That's why I was laughing in the first place; I knew what your reaction would be!

H: Anyway, isn't she dead? *see footnote*

M: Well, you see, that's where the time paradox comes in because if the bomb was never detonated, then none of that would have happened, ergo, she's alive! In one scenario anyway. They're at least going to show some of what would have happened had the plane never crashed because all these original characters are coming back and I've even seen the set photos of Claire being pregnant and Boone being there, and... Herein continues a long convoluted diatribe, the likes of which I will spare you--you're welcome--but suffice it to say I was pretty much the only one talking the whole six-mile drive.

And that's when my awful realization came upon me.

I am just as big a geek as he is.

Okay, maybe more.

*I realize some of my faithful readers have not yet finished Season 5. I left these spoilers in white, for those who wish not to find out what happens in the very last scene of that season. For those who would like to read it, simply highlight the text.

For those who have no idea which Season 5 I speak of, much less who is this Juliet #1 who is showing up approximately 39 days before our own...go ahead and highlight the text. You'll still be as confused as ever.*

Uninspired.

2009-10-15T11:02:00.003-05:00

Honestly, I swore I'd never write about how I had nothing to write about. But here I am, entirely and utterly uninspired. Not really for lack of things to write about--I could talk about how really great homeschooling is going and how this year is shaping up to be the best one yet, I could talk about places I have been recently and how a trip on my own could have ended badly (it did) but how it didn't matter because of the love of two wonderful friends--hi Jackie and Annie! I could talk about my new camera, which I haven't used yet because I can't afford any lenses for it right now and probably won't for quite some time, or I could speculate about current events, or how and why the loss of the leader of an organization I am not even a member of has affected me so deeply. I could ruminate about planning for the holidays, the various organizational or schedu-al (which is a new word I've made up) systems I've been embarking on, the resurgence of my spiritual "groove", how Baby Girl J is doing, or about our disgusting 6-legged home invaders...

But I'm just so dang uninspired.

Birthday Girl

2009-09-23T09:52:00.004-05:00

Six years ago this kind-hearted, hilarious little girl entered this world. I can honestly tell you that our lives have never been and will never be the same since that day.

Feed Me, Seymore!

2009-09-13T04:49:00.003-05:00

So the other night we ordered a Jumbo pizza from Godfather's. And I mean, this pizza is so huge that our entire family of five could only eat half the pizza for supper that night (well, we did have potato wedges to go with it). No problem, right, I figured the outside-the-home worker could take a couple pieces to work for lunch the next day and the kids and I could have the rest for lunch at home.

Next day, 12:30 p.m., it is much later than we usually eat lunch because school had gone a bit long. The children were about to destroy each other out of hunger and I'm about to pass out from not eating in five hours. It would be so very simple to just throw the pizza in the microwave, plop a bag of baby carrots on the table, and immediately satiate myself and the beasts.

Except that when I ran upstairs and opened the refrigerator...THERE WAS NO PIZZA. So I called dear husband--surely this was a mistake, he would never take all the pizza to work leaving the rest of his family to waste away in the middle of the day, right? Well, his phone went straight to voicemail and I rapidly deduced that this was indeed what had happened. So I did what any self-respecting pregnant woman would do in this situation--I sent the following text message:

JERK!!!! You took all my pizza DAMMIT!!!!! (sad face emoticon followed by mad face emoticon followed by red-faced horned emoticon followed by six more sad emoticons followed by three green-faced puking emoticons)

Then I sat down and cried. Cried, for the loss of an easy lunch preparation. Cried, because of high-pitched shrieking and wailing of the hungry clamor of the beasts. Cried, for the health and safety of my dear husband..because who knew just what kind of damage I might inflict on him when he returned home that night.

So anyway, I figured that message would convey the gist of my feelings, and I expected a response full of remorse and shame. Except shortly thereafter I received this on my phone:

Ha ha! That was hilarious! I'm totally saving this one for posterity. (grinning face emoticon)

Later I found out a bunch of coworkers also thought this was hilarious. Why do people think a pregnant, hungry, raving lunatic is so funny, I ask you?

Did I mention I'm having food issues lately?

Someone Should Warn Her

2009-09-09T22:04:00.007-05:00

Really, someone should warn her that this could be hazardous to her health.

Uncharted Territory

2009-09-02T15:31:00.001-05:00

So Middle Child was helping me make the bed yesterday morning. Oldest Child, feeling the need to put little sister in her place, was taunting her with math problems. The following is recreation is how it all went down:

H: You don't know what 1+1 equals.

E: I do too.

H: You don't know that it equals 2. I learned that in first grade and you don't even know that yet. Ha!

E: Slams the door in Oldest Child's face.

Then commences the putting on of pillows on my bed.

E: Only in Hannah-Hannah-La-La Land that equals 2!

Rolls eyes.

WARNING: Books Can Be Hazardous to Your Health

2009-09-02T03:14:00.005-05:00

I have long believed that an addictive habit of reading can be toxic. Generally, though, this belief stems from allowing myself to be sucked in to a very good book. The more believable the characters are, the more exciting the plot, the more well-written the story...it all correlates to the amount of time I spend both reading the book and mulling the book over in my mind while not reading, and thus the less appealing everyday tasks seem in relation.

Which all translates into: My house gets really messy and the kids yell at me to put down the stinking book and make them some food. Can you believe these gall of these beasts, wanting to be fed every day or something?

Reading selection from last night

So anyhoo, that's not really what I want to warn you about this time. No, I'm here today to warn you of this simple fact: If you do not put the book down at night--if you decide to just finish off the last 400 or so pages of your 600- or so -page book--after turning the last page, you will look out your bedroom window and it will be light outside. Then you will sleep half the day away, thanking your lucky stars the other adult in the house is home that day. Which will probably lead to not being able to sleep again the next night, eventually giving up and deciding to blog about the sheer insanity of it all at 3:25 a.m.

Reading selection from tonight

Tomorrow night (or would that be tonight?) -- Tylenol PM.

An insomnia-inspired blast from the past can be found here.

Forlorn.

2009-08-31T10:44:00.004-05:00

One rainy evening earlier this summer I ran to the grocery store, pulled into a parking space, got out of my van, looked down, and saw this in the empty spot next to my vehicle:

Which led me to a multitude of questions:

Who left this shoe in a parking lot?

Why just one?

If you're going to leave a part of your wardrobe in a parking lot, mightn't you just as well leave both shoes?

What good is the other shoe going to be to this person now?

I'm a little more fixated on the number of shoes rather than what sort of silly reason there could be as to why it was left behind.

Random, Just Totally Random

2009-08-06T07:41:00.003-05:00

We Didn't Start The Fire came out when I was ten years old. Two of the many lyrics I could never figure out were anther catcher in their eyes and choppin' up the little minds. Three points for whoever knows which lyrics I'm talking about.

*************************************

OJ and Sprite together is very, very good.

**************************************

I now know what it feels like to have H1N1 while pregnant.

**************************************

Baby is okay, alive and kicking. I have had two ultrasounds so far, which I would like to share, but I cannot find them. This misplacing disorder I have is getting worse.

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There are only 167 days left until LOST comes back! I think I'm going to install a countdown timer on my blog. Because yes, I am just that much of a geek.

The Story of Stuff

2009-08-03T13:12:00.004-05:00

Long but worth it. It is required watching for me at least once a month. I forget easily.

She Takes After Her Dad

2009-07-16T05:55:00.003-05:00

This Relaxed Homeschooler

2009-07-14T14:27:00.002-05:00

Originally published at Homeschoolin' Mamas
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is doing a 180.

We have taken the plunge and signed the girls up with Minnesota Virtual Academy (a K12 program). I think I will miss our relaxed homeschooling days, but it is exciting to move on to something new, as well.

Why the change, you may ask?

Well. As much as what we have done for the past two years has really worked for us in these early grades, the times they are a-changin'. Firstborn Daughter is now moving on to third grade, and she really needs something more rigorous and organized and scheduled and planned and detailed and...you get what I'm saying? I just don't have the time or energy to put into making her education rigorous, organized, scheduled, planned, and detailed on my own. In order to continue homeschooling now that she is older, there are two of school age at home now, Max will be right behind them shortly, pregnant mama is sick and crabby and miserable, there is still a house to keep clean, meals to be made, fun to be had...(deep breath)...we need to turn to some outside direction.

And I am very excited about this outside direction! The best thing about this program is that it is all laid out for us. All books, materials for experiments, a computer, everything, is mailed right to our doorstep and modem with complete instructions, for free! I'm sure there will end up being downsides to this; I'm wondering how it's going to be having to report every thing they do and grade things, etc. I'm also wondering how having to learn within a certain time frame of the year is going to work for us. I think it's a challenge we are up for, however.

I just love learning, growing, and changing as a family. This has been a real pleasant surprise of adult life for me.

Patriotic, The Sequel

2009-07-08T15:56:00.005-05:00

Independence Day, Urban-Dwelling Kids' Style

Patriotic

2009-07-05T21:29:00.003-05:00

Attention Viewers:

2009-07-02T12:06:00.002-05:00

I am not a phone talker. I do not know when this happened, but I'm pretty sure it was somewhere in between the 3 a.m. long phone calls in college and having three children. Specifically trying to entertain, feed, clothe, educate, mediate, and hide in the bathroom from three children.

Somewhere along the line there I contracted a horrible, terrible, no-good, very-bad disease called Phone Phobia. I blame it on the aforementioned children; however, I admittedly have no fine-tuned research basis for this assertion. I love my phone because I can text to my heart's content and because of its uber-organizational skills. I'm not so fond of that button up there (see picture, top) in the shape of a handset.

That's really all I have to say. Informative, isn't it? Oh, the reason this all comes to mind is because I finally made myself return one phone call this morning that I have been putting off for days. A presumably good phone call which will presumably actually lead me in positive financial gains...a phone call which presumably will further some random career aspirations...

...the interested party was not home and I got to leave a message. Phew!

Now I can put my terrible, horrible, no-good, very-bad Phone Phobia off until interested party calls back.

I'm pathetic, really.

Nature

2009-06-23T21:51:00.009-05:00

Bee in Flight

It's Pollen Time around here, and if this photo doesn't prove it,
just look at my kids' runny noses. Then you'll understand.

Broken Web

Kinda disappointing. I really wanted to shoot a spider on
this web.

Runaway Max

He really wanted to run into the water after the
"cack-cack cucks". see footnote 1 We're having this Max
running off and away predicament frequently. Wake me up
when he turns four.

Dad's Little Fisherpeople

Nothing much to say about this one. The photo really tells
the story. It might be one of my favorites.

Trail of Tears

"It's toooooo long!" "My feet hurt."
"I HATE mosquitoes!" "You said we could get
ice cream!"

The End.

Footnote 1: translated "quack quack duck". Did you get that one?

Straight From the School of Hard Knocks

2009-06-03T12:11:00.002-05:00

Me: Girls, you need to go downstairs and start picking up your room.

Girls: Nooooooooooo! Whine whine whine. Complain complain complain. Ad infinitum, ad nauseum....blah blah blah...you get the picture...

*********************************************************************

Seven hundred and fifty hours later, they are finally downstairs doing what they are supposed to.

Except.

I hear singing.

It makes me happy that they have decided to put such a positive spin on a dreaded task.

Except.

As I wander further down the stairs, I realize just exactly what it is they are singing.

*******************************************************************

Girls: It's a hard knock life. For us. It's a hard knock life. For us. No one cares for you a smidge. When you're in an orphanage.

********************************************************************

Laugh all you want, but this --coupled with the eight thousand and thirty times I have heard Yes, Miss Hannigan in response to my requests lately-- just tells me that a certain DVD staring a certain curly redhead needs to get back to the library ASAP.

Because You Know I Just Had To

2009-06-01T12:52:00.003-05:00

Say something, that is. Remember this post? Remember how I postulated that emotionalism is maybe not the best way to go about solving The Great American Rift?

Just look what happens when emotionalism rules the person. Now, I am hearing a lot of people say, so what? So what if he's gone; that just means he is no longer able to kill babies. That the man who has committed this "murder of a murderer" should now be a hero for advancing the prolife cause. Well, HELLO people, murder is not an act of life, it is an act of death. And not only does it not help people to see the atrocity of late-term elective abortions, it furthers the supposition that anyone associated with a word in which this killer associates himself has little regard for any person in a state of life beyond birth.

I cannot imagine the pain that Mr. Tiller's wife had to feel, seeing him lie dying on a church floor. This family has lost a husband, a father, a son. I sit and wonder about someone deeming my own life not worth living because of my "sins". No matter what his life entailed, his is still a life gone before its time. No one deserves an end like this, be it a 67-year-old abortionist, a 27-week-old-fetus, or even a worldwide terrorist. No one.

Er...duh..um...

2009-05-31T14:33:00.002-05:00

And one more word to describe this:

Wow...

Good for him that there's no such thing as negative publicity, right?

Our Little Accessory

2009-05-28T13:05:00.006-05:00

Lord save him from being the younger brother of two older sisters, Amen.

Today he came up to me with teal nail polish on all five left fingernails.

Yesterday they thought it would be funny to put a (large) doll's dress on him and a bonnet.

The day before that someone decided he needed to learn about high heels and purses.

Now, I'm all for letting my son show his feminine side--goodness knows the perpetrators show their "masculine" sides often enough--but this poor boy has no clue. Hey, if he grows up and wants to partake in all this silly girlishness (of which I, thankfully, escaped in my own childhood) well more power to 'im. But you gotta feel a little bad for the dude, being paraded around in the fashion akin to a small accessory dog.

He's just so darn cute. I know they can't resist.

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

2009-05-01T12:26:00.011-05:00

Originally posted at Homeschoolin' Mamas
***************************************************

Tuesday was Field Trip Day. We decided to fit in a little science and a little social studies all in one day. First up was the zoo, which was a blast.

Just look at this sleepy guy!

And his friend, Mr. Not-So-Sleepy.

Giraffe eye. Creepy or cool? You decide.

Ooooh! You totally need to click on Mr. Bluefrog to enlarge the picture for detail. He was SO cool.

These guys, notsomuch. Enlarge them only if nonsqueamish.

Yo. Wuzzuuuup?

You can pick your friends...

Mmmm. Boogers. Yum.

OMGosh! You saw that? I'm so embarrassed.

Hannah's Big Day

2009-04-27T14:24:00.003-05:00

My big girl was so excited for this day. She took her preparations quite seriously, as well as the whole Sacrament. Sometimes this girl drives me crazy and we clash a lot. But when her behavior is troublesome to me, I at least can rest easy in the fact that she has quite the special relationship with God going on. Priorities, you know.

Max Attack

2009-04-18T12:00:00.004-05:00

Poor, poor Chanel. She never saw it (him) coming. Pity.

Easter on the Prairie

2009-04-14T13:48:00.007-05:00

We stepped out the door on our way to the in-laws' Sunrise Service. And what a sunrise it was!

This is what it looks like in the "parking lot" of a tiny country church at 7 a.m. The majority of the vehicles are parked evenly on the crushed Sioux quartzite, and the vehicles you see in the back are parked off the side of the cornfield. If you were to sit in one of these vehicles in the driver's seat you would be immediately facing the cemetery, which is the yard of the church. Which is where the children play. Well, you know, all five children that belong to this church, that is.

And this is what a bad family picture in front of said church looks like. With a little bit of equally horrendous photo doctoring on top. I feel the need to remind everyone that it was buttcrack-o'-dawn-thirty and really windy as well. And, I wasn't even taking the photo, so I am adamant that I cannot and will not be held responsible.

And this is later--sheltered from the wind and past the buttcrack-o'-dawn-thirty bleary-eyed-ness. My grandfather-in-law doing what he does best--staring off into space. But not in a bad way. Oftentimes this look he has perfected is followed by an expansive tale of piloting in WWII or, alternately, the proper soil temperature of some obscure Brazilian fruit tree. I like to use hyphens whenever I can--it makes life interesting.

Stay tuned, more to come.

Inanimate Object Day: Birthday Aftermath Edition

2009-04-08T09:37:00.005-05:00

IOD is back! Submitted for your amusement and droolishness, I give you:

Exhibit A

Found last week on my bedroom carpet. Somebody started sending me envelopes stuffed with various-sized "30" confetti before my birthday. The dime is placed for scale. I swear I've since been picking them up off the floor for going on two months now...thanks somebody.

Exhibit B

Somebody else made me a chocolate mocha crustless cheesecake for my birthday. Thanks, somebody else. And this time I mean it.

His First Haircut

2009-04-06T11:56:00.006-05:00

The time had come. Granted, he didn't have much hair to begin with; however, Mr. Max was cursed with the dreaded tail. Not one of those duck-tails popular circa 1991, which would have been easy enough just to snip off at the bottom, but a tail that began a quarter length down the back of his head and ended about three-quarters down.

I wish this picture did it justice, but bad lighting plus squirmy kid does not the greatest depiction make. Oh well, just believe me when I say it was a noticeably cute little quirk. Anyhoo, so the other evening as he sat on my lap I realized he had some sort of sticky goo caught in the tail. I tried to comb it out but I only succeeded in making him "owie" and angry.

But when I brought out the scissors he decided that was a great and novel way to spend the evening, especially considering the baby in the big silver wall was having the same thing done to him! What excitement! I know, right?

Emme graciously volunteered to catch all the wayward wispy strands to save in Ziploc posterity forever. I admit I was a little bit sad because 20 months is the earliest I've ever had to give a haircut, but that sticky gooey tail just had to go.

Can you tell a difference? Yeah, I can't really tell a difference either.

Emme vs. the Van, Episode Deux

2009-03-31T13:30:00.003-05:00

Here we bring you the next installment in the continuing saga of Getting Emme to Get in the Vehicle and Buckle her Seatbelt:

M: Get in and buckle up because we are LATE.

M: Buckle up because we are LATE!

M: Buckle up!!!!!!!!!!!

E: Staring confusedly, as if I am speaking a foreign language.

Crickets can be heard chirping.

Even though it's March 31.

M: Buckle up! Do you want me to throttle you, girl?

E: Sigh. I don't even know what that word means, but I say no.

Learning Experience

2009-03-30T10:35:00.004-05:00

What I learned on my blogging vacation:

My aura is blue.

I know-a-lot about: LOST season 5, Dirty Dancing, 80s sitcoms, famous Grease quotes, songs from the 60s-90s, The Breakfast Club, my body, Spongebob, cool toys of the 70s and 80s, Disney and other animated movies, and 80s singers

My birthday says that I dislike unnecessary things

My mommy style is 'Patient Polly'

The type of shoe that defines me is red ballet slippers

I am William McKinley

My parents should have named me Olivia

I am also Maurice Sendak

I rock out like Journey

I theologize like C.S. Lewis

I am June Cleaver

Dr. Phil thinks I am the lively center of attention

I was Queen Elizabeth I in a past life

Politically I apparently am a Libertarian-Individualist

I am represented by a sunflower

The animal I identify most with is a penguin

I am most like rock music

Of all the Mr. Men characters I am Mr. Messy

Miss Marple is the fictional detective I most strongly identify with

Quizzes aren't necessarily indicative of my true feelings on certain subjects

It IS possible to spend far too many hours on Facebook when you are recovering from surgery or the flu...or both...

When you go through sadness in life friends and family will rally around you, pray for you, sympathize with you, offer to babysit your children, bring you meals, remember your little one, and send you towers of chocolate

I love my friends and family

Oh, and I should have the job of President of the United States :-D

Crayola!

2009-03-20T07:34:00.001-05:00

Originally posted at Homeschoolin' Mamas
***********************************************

Love, love, LOVE this website. If you are a homeschooler, or even just a parent or someone who deals with kids, you will love it too!

From My Inbox to You

2009-03-11T16:18:00.001-05:00

I thought this one was worth passing on to others ~ Kelly

Welcome to Homeschool.com's bi-weekly E-zine, developed specifically
to help you with your homeschooling. Please feel free to forward this
issue to friends, family and associates!

Rebecca Kochenderfer, Editor of Homeschool.com sat down with Brett Walter, the Founder and President of the Homeschool Buyers Co-op, to talk about the Co-op and the services it provides to homeschoolers. For more information about the Homeschool Buyers Co-op, click here. Note: Co-op membership is FREE and confidential.

March 10, 2009

Sign Me Up!
for this e-zine

Send to a Friend

INTERVIEW:

Rebecca: Welcome, Brett. Why don’t you start by giving us an overview of the Homeschool Buyers Co-op?

Brett: Sure. With over 37,000 homeschooling family members, the Homeschool Buyers Co-op is the world’s largest purchasing cooperative for homeschooling families. In a nutshell, what we do is use our purchasing power to get volume discounts on high-quality curriculum for members.

Rebecca: What a great idea! How did you come up with it?

Brett: Well, when my wife and I decided to homeschool our twin boys over four years ago, we went to a local homeschool conference. I was wandering through the vendor exhibit hall, and it struck me – school districts get volume discounts, but we homeschoolers are all paying retail prices! The reason for that, of course, is that school districts have purchasing power, and homeschoolers don’t. So I went up to some of the vendors and said, "If I were to put together a buying group of homeschoolers, would you give us volume discounts?" and they all replied "Of course!"

Rebecca: So you just plunged right in and started the Homeschool Buyers Co-op?

Brett: Not right away. I wanted to see if the idea was powerful enough to attract a major supplier. So I placed a cold call to the Dell group responsible for educational sales, and, after bouncing around a bit, finally connected with a guy who seemed to be the right person to talk to. I’ll never forget that first conversation. I said "Jason, are you aware that there are over 1,000,000 homeschooling families in the U.S., and no major computer manufacturer is paying any attention to us whatsoever?" There was a pause at the other end of the phone, and I thought to myself "Gotcha!" After a few conversation, we worked out a great deal whereby members could get discount off a Dell desktop computer,
and I launched the Co-op.

Rebecca: And things just took off?

Brett: Not exactly! I soon discovered that the hardest thing was getting awareness. I took a booth at a homeschool conference and started signing folks up, one at a time. It was pretty slow going, and I was getting pretty discouraged. One of the visitors to the booth was Diane Flynn Keith, a nationally-known homeschooler. She was so supportive of what I was trying to do! The next morning, she wrote an endorsement of the Co-op in her newsletter, and that same day over 2,000 homeschoolers joined!

Rebecca: Fast forward four years. How is the Co-op doing today?

Brett: Well, we now serve 37,000 families, but with over 1 million families homeschooling, we sure wish that more of them knew about us – we could save them so much money! That’s why we’re always saying to members – "Tell your friends and homeschool groups!" A large membership is the key to the savings we are able to bring to homeschoolers. Having said that, I’m very pleased that our membership is now large enough that we are taken seriously by virtually every curriculum provider in the country.

Rebecca: I have seen some incredible offers on your website for brand name curriculum like Rosetta Stone, Discovery Education, and Kaplan SAT Prep. You
call them "Group Buys", I think?

Brett: That's exactly right. We contact educational providers and say, "Hey, we think our members would be interested in your products. Would you give us volume pricing if we put together a buying group for your products?" If the answer is "Yes,", then we set up a Group Buy offer page on our website and say to members, for example, "Hey everybody, by purchasing as a group we will all save at least 20% and as much as 50%, depending on how many of us buy; so tell your friends!" Most Group Buys last only a month, but in many cases, once we hit the maximum discount, we are able to continue the Group Buys indefinitely, thereby locking in the great pricing for new members as well.

Rebecca: Are most curriculum providers willing to work with the Co-op?

Brett: Yes. There are a handful of companies that have declined to work with us, but the vast majority of the companies we contact are very supportive and come through with some absolutely fantastic pricing. Some great current examples are Mark Kistler drawing subscriptions (save 60%), Meet The Masters art education (save 50%),

Simply Music piano curriculum (save 35%), Explode The Code Online phonics curriculum (save 42%), and more. You can find many more examples in the Group Buy section of the Co-op website.

Some other suppliers want to work with the Co-op but are unwilling to discount their products. So, when we can, we become a reseller, sell at the required price, then rebate roughly half of our earnings to members in the form of SmartPoints – a special Co-op currency that can be used to purchase other curriculum available through the Co-op. A perfect example of this is Rosetta Stone. When members buy Rosetta Stone through the Co-op, they get the lowest price anywhere, free shipping, and a pile of SmartPoints that they can use to purchase
other curriculum through the Co-op. It truly is the BEST DEAL ON THE PLANET for Rosetta Stone. Other similar examples are Switched-On Schoolhouse from Alpha Omega and BrainPOP.

Still other suppliers have wonderful products for homeschoolers but have virtually no homeschool marketing program. They are willing to give the Co-op member discounts because we take on the heavy lifting of promoting and supporting their products. Some perfect examples of this are Discovery Education streaming Plus (save
$176), Discovery Education Science,
and Discovery Education Health. Members can save over 47%-76% on these products. Other examples are Destination Math (save up to 66%) from Houghton Mifflin, The History Channel Multimedia Classroom Series (save up to 40%),

Colonial Williamsburg Electronic Field Trips (save $450), and
BrainWare Safari (save $290)

Finally, there is a large universe of fantastic curriculum products that are not available to homeschoolers – except through the Co-op, if at all. That’s not because the publishers are hostile to homeschooling, but simply because they haven’t worked out the economics of marketing to and supporting homeschoolers at prices that are affordable to homeschoolers. So, in those cases, the Co-op will purchase a school or district license, and then bring members in under our license. Some examples of this are Kaplan SAT Online Prep (save $350),

Aha!Math (save 50%), EasyTech (save 45%) from Learning.com, and SkillsTutor(save 57%) from Houghton Mifflin.

Many of the products offered through the Co-op have won numerous educational awards. One of the things we hear over and over from members is not only appreciation for the great discounts, but also appreciation for the high quality of the curriculum that we make available. We are very proud of that record..

Rebecca: Do you have Group Buys for products from Christian publishers?

Brett: Absolutely. We run periodic Group Buys for Answers In Genesis, God's World News publications, Drive Thru History from National Day of Prayer, and products from Alpha Omega Publications, Standard Publishing, and others. We have frequent Group Buys for Dave Ramsey's financial literacy products. Dave is well-known for his faith. We also work with secular publishers. Keep in mind that we have a large and diverse membership. Many of them have gifted children, and they are interested in challenging curriculum such as Thinkwell video courseware (save
up to 44%) and Descartes’ Cove. Others have children with learning challenges, so we help out with self-paced, multi-sensory curriculum such as Skills Tutor (save 57%), Destination Math (save up to 66%), Math Fact Fluency (save 60%), and

YourTeacher.com (also a math product) (save 64%).

Rebecca: So, to take advantage of these great deals, homeschoolers need to join the Co-op. I understand that membership is free??

Brett: Yes, and absolutely confidential. We have a strict privacy policy, we do not rent or sell member contact info.

Rebecca: How do I use my membership to get discounts?

Brett: To participate in any Group Buy, you simply place your order on our website and you get the group price automatically.

Rebecca: Can you tell us about what else our readers can find on your website?

Brett: One of our most popular features is our free Homeschool ID card. You select a template, type in your info, upload a digital photo, push a button, and, voila! Our software generates an ID card image that you can print and laminate to make a passable ID card. Or, if you want a sturdy, professionally-printed ID card, we'll print it for you on PVC plastic for only $6.95. We also have a free classifieds section and many
other free services for homeschoolers. We maintain several databases of very useful information such as Free Curriculum, Field Trips, and Educational and Contests & Scholarships. We also have a large group of suppliers in our
network with ongoing,

exclusive discounts for members.

Rebecca: Brett, thanks so much for sharing this information with us!!

Brett: You are very welcome! Please ask your readers to forward this interview to their friends and homeschool groups!

This is Rebecca
Kochenderfer from Homeschool.com. Homeschool Buyers Co-Op did a group
buy for the book "Homeschooling and Loving It" which takes the price
down from $15.95 per book to $9.95 per book.

The coupon code is = LoveToHomeschool

The code is only good until March 31, 2009.

To order the book go to:
http://www.homeschool.com/hli

This is the method of homeschooling I used with my own children and it
has worked very well for us - my daughter received a large scholarship
to a high school for the performing arts and my son just received
honors-at-entrance to the university of his choice.

Feel free to pass this code on to others that might be interested.

Kind Regards,

Rebecca Kochenderfer

Senior Editor

www.homeschool.com

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Found the Camera, Lost the Baby

2009-03-06T13:47:00.004-06:00

There's a lot I want to say, but now that I'm actually here writing it, I don't feel like expounding on my day quite yet. I guess it needs to stay packaged up in my heart for a little longer. The short of it is that we've lost the baby, but I've been having a beautiful and bittersweet day - life-affirming amidst sorrow and loss. Life is beautiful and life sucks all at the same time.

Per the title of this post, I finally found my camera which I had previously thought was stolen. That's not the beautiful part of the day, although it doesn't hurt. It would be nice if a camera could take away all my pain, though. I'd totally buy that model.

How The Pro-Life Cause Could Be Helped

2009-02-21T20:10:00.006-06:00

Uh-oh, there she goes proselytizing again! Feel free to skip this one if you just can't stand it, or me. Although if you can't stand me...why are you even reading my blog?

Anyhoo. So we were watching this documentary the other day about the politicizing of abortion. And there was this scene where this lady was protesting outside a clinic, talking in a super high-pitched voice, pretending to speak for the unborn children of the women walking into the clinic. "Hi Mommy, I can't wait to meet you. Mommy, what are you doing? Mommy, why are you doing this to me? Mommy, please, I want to see your face. Mommy, NOOOO!"

Ugh. My stomach just about dropped to my knees. It was so horrendous I wanted to puke. I wanted to be there and ask that lady, "Just what good do you think that's going to do?" Does she think that by trying to sound like the baby it will change anything for that woman? I don't think so. In fact, I think that that scene is why people have such low opinions of some "pro-lifers". (see footnote 1) I wanted to yell at the screen for her to stop making us look like uneducated, intolerant fanatics! It honestly drives me crazy.

So here's my idea on how to help the pro-life cause. People seriously need to try to remain unemotional about the whole thing. I know it's hard, when you take in the enormity and the magnanimous reality of the whole thing. I know. It's hard for me to not get emotional about it as well. But I really think that we would all be better served to just stay with the basic scientific facts and go from there. You can't dispute facts, and remaining unemotional will definitely lead to more civil discussion.

If that's the desired end, anyway. For me, I don't think the issue is going anywhere until civil discourse ends up changing people's hearts and minds. On the other hand, if imparting guilt is the only desired effect, then by all means lets all go protest in high-pitched squeaky voices.

1 - When speaking of a group of people, I'll always put "pro-lifers" and "pro-choicers" in quotes. Because I don't think that a lot of "pro-lifers" are actually pro-ALL-life, they're actually just anti-abortion. And by the same token I think that using the phrase "pro-choicers" just masks pro-abortion with a prettier phrase. Semantics are everything, people.

Hannah's Screenplay

2009-02-18T03:21:00.001-06:00

Originally posted at Homeschoolin' Mamas
*******************************************

Translated by me, her mom.

Hannah: Hello Emme, what would [you like], a strawberry shake or a blueberry shake?

Emme: I'll take a blueberry shake.

Hannah: Ok.

I'm assuming some time has passed and some stage directions inadvertently got left off the screenplay.

Emme: I didn't order this.

Hannah: I'm so sorry.

www.kidshows.com

They want to produce their play and put it on this website. Just in case you wanted to know the motivation behind the project. I have no idea if this website even exists.

Emme: Waiter, I'm starved over here.

Hannah: I'm so sorry, my Lady.

Emme: I ordered a blueberry shake.

Hannah: We've always had...

The rest is supposed to say "people order strawberry shakes". However, the screenplay was abandoned creative midstream and has yet to be picked up again. That was about three months ago.

I think they get their short-lived enthusiasm from someone I know...

Ahem. My own faults aside, I am proud of their efforts (even if there are some crucial details missing) and am certainly looking forward to seeing Hannah's first Broadway screenplay. Of course.

Because You All Wanted To Know...

2009-02-13T21:16:00.003-06:00

...just what are the most pressing issues facing our country today, in my opinion?

Breaking it Down

1. The chick with the bazillions of kids. Everyone is in an uproar because she had octuplets when she already had six kids and was on assistance and now all the taxpayers have to pay for all these little punks.

To Which I Say: I think you're missing the point. Who really cares if taxpayer money is going to help raise these kids? They're here already--what do you want them to do, end up homeless or starving? A child is always a GOOD thing, although the means it was created by and the situation it happens to be born into may not be ideal or even acceptable. If it has to be taken care of, then it has to, by whatever means necessary.

But whatever, I am going to be seriously unpopular here and seem all prudish, but I think the real tragedy here is that she decided to bring them all into the world without the support of a father. There is no way one lady can take care of 14 children on her own, which makes me feel bad for the kids. That, and I don't like the idea of in vitro fertilization in the first place. Opens up a whole 'nother can of worms which leads to scenarios such as this. And worse.

2. Is it really fair that Chuck Wicks gets to be partnered with Julianne Hough on the next season of DWTS?

To Which I Say: No, it is not fair! They are going to have an unfair advantage over the rest of the contestants, and seriously, who thought this was a good idea? Sheesh.

3. Was Pam really telling the truth to Michael about the letter he stole from Holly's computer?

To Which I Say: I'm not sure. I hope she was, because I want to see more of Holly and Michael! That A.J. dude looks SO not her type anyway.

4. The economic stimulus package: Good thing? Bad thing?

To Which I Say: I really don't freaking care. I guess Democrats are going to think it's a good thing and Republicans are going to think it's a bad thing. Being an Independent Socialist Libertarian, myself, I have a tiny inkling that maybe this isn't the best idea at this juncture in our country's history, but on the other hand? If it means I don't have to pay back that huge-o first-time-homebuyer credit we got that was supposed to act as a 15-year loan...I'm all for it!

And now to the most pressing issue facing our nation today...

5. Are all the members of the Oceanic Six going to make it back to the island on time? Is Mrs. Hawking Daniel's mother? Are Sawyer and Juliet having a thing? Is Miles Dr. Candle's son? Is Aaron really Jacob? Is Richard really from Ancient Egypt?

To Which I Say: Yes to all!

Hm, all that and I don't even have television.

So what are your ideas on these important issues?

Stars of 1979: The End

2009-02-11T05:51:00.003-06:00

In honor of my birthday week, I'm going back in time thirty years and going to share amusing little tidbits or flashbacks from that sweet, sweet year--1979!

It's the Year 1979

My little friends and I thirty years ago!

Lying in my purply lead paint-encrusted crib. I teethed on that crib. Yum, yum.

Stars of 1979: Day Five

2009-02-10T05:38:00.002-06:00

In honor of my birthday week, I'm going back in time thirty years and going to share amusing little tidbits or flashbacks from that sweet, sweet year--1979!

It's the Year 1979

Stars of 1979: Day Four

2009-02-09T05:35:00.001-06:00

In honor of my birthday week, I'm going back in time thirty years and going to share amusing little tidbits or flashbacks from that sweet, sweet year--1979!

It's the Year 1979

Cost of a new home: $71,800.00

Median Household Income: $16,461.00

Cost of a first-class stamp: $0.15

Cost of a gallon of regular gas: $0.86

Cost of a dozen eggs: $0.85

Cost of a gallon of Milk: $1.62

...One Diabolical Fetus at a Time!

2009-02-08T05:13:00.001-06:00

The other day I had this largish rant about something that ticks me off. I mentioned that the subject of such largish rant was in no way an announcement.

However, THIS little alien-looking bouncing dude does happen to be an announcement!

Although scientifically I guess I should call it my "diabolical embryo" since little dude won't be a fetus for another couple weeks. By the way, I had to include the little footnote at the bottom of that other entry because I couldn't very well tell the blogosphere before I told my own mother, yeah? Although a savvy enough reader could have deduced such a thing.

Bonus? I'm pretty sure no one is going to have a rude response for me after my little tirade. I can't say the same for poor hubs, though. Unfortunately the majority of the list of inappropriate responses have been directed at him by well-meaning colleagues, I'm sure.

Srsly? A Rant.

2009-02-06T21:42:00.003-06:00

Disclaimer: Largish ticked-off venting ahead.

In case you missed Social Cues 101, let me be the one to tell you something. The only appropriate response to anyone's news of a new baby is CONGRATULATIONS. That's IT. I don't care if you personally find the news worth congratulating or not, it's just basic decency. Whether it is a first child, fourth child, eighteenth child, I DON'T CARE.

Here's a list of some absolutely inappropriate and rude responses to aforementioned news:

1. Staring in dumbfounded shock and walking away.

2. Shaking your head while frowning.

3. "Oh no! An oops?"

4. "Guess NFP really doesn't work, does it?"

5. "WHY????"

6. "How in the world are you going to do it?"

7. "Children are so expensive!"

8. "Did you plan this?"

Think these comments in your head, gossip about it all you want while out of earshot, I don't care. But please have some decency and don't act disappointed or horrified at the prospect. I know it is hard to understand, but some people find children not only blessings but an overall societal good--especially when brought into strong, stable, loving, and educated homes.

Just sign me,

Overpopulating the world, one diabolical fetus at a time!

***THIS IS NOT AN ANNOUNCEMENT OF ANY SORT. MERELY A RANT.***

Travels in Cognition

There's a SIM Card in That Thar Crockpot!

Project 365: Day 46

Project 365: Day 45

Project 365: Day 44

Project 365: Day 43

Project 365: Day 47

Project 365: Day 41

Project 365: Day 40

Project 365: Day 39

Project 365: Day 38

Project 365: Day 37

Project 365: Day 36

Project 365: Day 35

Project 365: Day 34

Project 365: Day 31

Project 365: Day 30

Project 365: Day 29

Project 365: Day 28

Project 365: Day 27

Project 365: Day 26

Project 365: Day 20

Project 365: Day 19

Project 365: Day 18

Project 365: Day 17

Project 365: Day 15

Project 365: Day 14

Project 365: Day 13

Going Public

Project 365: Day 12

Project 365: Day 11

Project 365: Day 10

Project 365: Day 9

Project 365: Day 4

Project 365: Day 3

Project 365: Day 2

New Year: Project 365: Day 1

Short blurb for posterity

Situational Irony

Feet!

Juliet and Her Grandpa

Trying Something New

Asian Sprout Salad

Faces of Max

I Need to Learn to Enunciate

More Faces of Juliet

Faces of Juliet

PSA: Very Important Message Regarding Education

College Life

2009 Recap: December

2009 Recap: October

2009 Recap: September

2009 Recap: August

2009 Recap: July

2009 Recap: June

2009 Recap: May

2009 Recap: April

2009 Recap: March

2009 Recap: February

2009 Recap: January

Boring Bulleted Updates

The Evil Overpopulator Strikes Again

The Awful Realization

Uninspired.

Birthday Girl

Feed Me, Seymore!

Someone Should Warn Her

Uncharted Territory

WARNING: Books Can Be Hazardous to Your Health

Forlorn.

Random, Just Totally Random

The Story of Stuff

She Takes After Her Dad

This Relaxed Homeschooler

Patriotic, The Sequel

Patriotic

Attention Viewers:

Nature

Straight From the School of Hard Knocks

Because You Know I Just *Had* To

Because You Know I Just Had To